please i really need you help am a lesbian and am kind of lonely i cant get myself a partner since in my country its kind of illegal so no one can come up an declare the status due to fear what do i do?

First and foremost, I feel for your situation. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to not be able to be who you are for fear of persecution.  I wish I could offer simple advice and say it will all be OK, but that is not always the case for our fellow LGBT brothers and sisters in countries where homosexuality is illegal and community members are persecuted.

I recommend you understand the laws where you live to determine legality of homosexuality and the potential consequences – LGBT Rights By Country – this list offers the latest information about the legal status of homosexuality, arrests and other criminal activity against homosexual tourists/locals.

Your options -

1. You could move to a more LGBT friendly country.  I understand that there are many reasons this may not be an option from not being financially feasible to not wanting to leave your homeland, family and friends – but many LGBT community members have elected ths option and even sought political asylum.  The Difficulties of US Asylum Claims Based on Sexual Orientation, Obama Offers Asylum to Overseas Gays, Europe sends gays seeking asylum back home and back to the closet.
2. Others choose a more temporary relief and choose to study abroad.  This allows them the chance to get away and consider their priorities.
3. Pursue same sex relations locally – there are likely others like you.  Obviously, you won’t be out and open and there is still the fear of being caught.
4. Do nothing and avoid the risks of persecution.  I am guessing this isn’t a favorable option, or you wouldn’t be writing.
5. Seek online outlets.  While this may result in a partner, you may find addition information, meet others in similar situations and learn from them and how they handled it.

I wish this wasn’t a problem and that we all were were free to love who we chose.  But this is not the reality in many parts of the world.  Get informed, seek out information and like minded spirits.  You are not alone.

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