OPINION: Do Age Gaps In Dating Really Matter?

Is age just a number?

by Joshua Walker | 27th August 2014

How old is too old?

For the last few weeks I’ve been casually meeting up with a new friend - a 55 year old dentist from South London. He’s a little Roger Moore-ish (without being that ‘moreish’) – he’s handsome, trendy, sweet and interesting - but 30 years my senior!

So it’s completely innocent, we just occasionally grab drinks or dinner. Although he has started to peck me on the lips whenever I try to air kiss him. Something I just laugh it off (awkwardly). At times I’m forced to do ‘Matrix-like’ manoeuvres or resort to having to distract him as he leans in – “is that shop offering 2 for 1 on dentures?”

Tonight he had invited me out to see a play - and we were meeting for a pre-theatre dinner.

However, I got a curt message just now to say “Sorry I have to cancel tonight something’s come up. Also I now have a BF so may be best to leave it from now on. Good luck with everything”.

Which begs the question - did he think we were dating?

Yes we went out as a two-some, but does that necessarily mean we were a couple? No hand-holding, no kisses and (definitely) no sex! Marriage? Maybe. Dating - certainly not! (At least not in today’s world!)

I was also terribly impressed how he got a boyfriend in less than 24 hours. If only he moved that fast when we walking around London.

At 40, Dustin Lance Black is 20 years older than the six-pack owning, budgie-smuggling twink, Tom Daley. It all seems a little eerie to me.

What do they talk about? What do they even have in common? Let’s put it into perceptive, whilst Tom might like the classic sounds of the Bee Gees, it’s very possible that Dustin actually was one!

I sometimes think that daddy-issues or even money and security are sometimes the motivation for these unconventional relationships. I always (half) jokingly say, the older and fatter they are - the richer they have to be! And for me, Roger being a dentist is no substitute for wrinkles and grey pubes.

For a week I dated an Italian 18 year old. Whilst holding hands and kissing in public – I would get double-takes and angry glares. It was when we headed out for a posh meal one night and he was offered the Kids’ Menu I knew I had to let him go. Plus I don’t know what ‘yo-lo’ means and there’s only so many conversations I can have about ‘Sponge Bob Square Pants’.

Although it might work for some people, dating older guys isn’t my thing - with dating someone older, I always have fear that in 30 years’ time - when I want to buy a sports car, get a piercing and contact Joan River’s plastic surgeon to achieve that science-fictionally youthful (and eternally surprised) look – they’ll also be recapturing their youth and I’ll be changing their nappies instead.

And with my 55 year old ‘friend’ acting like a baby now – doesn’t it make the prospect of future nappy-changing seem a whole-lot more real?